"For with God nothing shall be impossible." (Luke 1:37) It's amazing what we can do through God's help that we couldn't do alone.
A couple of weeks ago, we took in a 2 year old little boy (H) for respite for a weekend; he was so good and we had a great time. Then just hours after H left, we got a call asking us to take him and his 9 month old sister (D) in for a few days while they found them a new foster home. Without too much thought, I said yes. After I hung up the phone, it hit me that by taking them, I'll now have 5 kids under 4 (3, 2, 2, 9 months, 7 months). I started panicking a little and praying that D was as good of a sleeper as H.
That first night, after the usual bedtime routine and all the kids were in bed, 4 out of 5 were crying and none were asleep. Matt and I looked at each other with a look of "what did we get ourselves into!?" I had half a mind to call their DCS worker up the next morning and tell them that we just can't do this, not even for 4 more days. But within half an hour, all the kids calmed down, and soon all were asleep. And everyone slept through the night!
So we did do it; we lasted 5 days having 5 kids under 4. And the crazy thing was, by the last night, after all the kids were asleep, Matt and I looked at each other with a look of "we could keep doing this longer." If it wasn't for the fact that we didn't have a van to transport all the kids, we really might have considered keeping H and D as a regular foster placement. Something that seemed crazy and impossible at first all of a sudden had become doable.
This whole experience reminded me of a story in the Book of Mormon where Alma and his people were in bondage to the Lamanites. They had great burdens placed on them and life was very difficult. They turned to the Lord in prayer and the Lord eased their burdens; "the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease" (Moisah 24:15). The nature of their burdens didn't change, but they became stronger with God's help. I feel like that's what God did for us in those 5 days; the kids didn't become better behaved or perfect sleepers (actually, in some ways, they got worse). But we were able to handle it, to be patient and organized enough to stay sane. My testimony was strengthened by this and I know that God will always help me through any difficulty I will face in the future. I am also more confident as a mother; I'm not perfect and I don't always respond in the the best way to my kiddos, but I am trying and improving and doing a good job.
God knows me and He knows my potential. While my life isn't what I imagined it would be like or planned it to be, I trust in His plan and know that all will be well. With His help, I can handle anything.
